No excuses

Fans, it's been too long. Let me tell you what has been going on.
Just after my last blog, Mom and Bob left AGAIN and went to the Virgin Islands. They were gone about a week and while I tried, I was unable to be a good boy for Ashley. I won't go into my behavior, but rest assured, the word "destructive" came up quite a bit. I made my peace with Ashley and we are friends again, thank goodness. Hate making my girlfriends sad.
So when Mom and Bob came home, Mom had something shiny on her finger and that equates to Bob and Bella are not leaving. They are here to stay. I am grappling with this on so many levels. First off, let's talk about Bob. Nice enough guy, good to Mommy. However, he has an iron fist when it comes to discipline. Thus, on some days, we are like oil and water. He has implemented use of the kennel far more frequently than I would prefer. Bob does not find me as adorable as Mommy which has presented issues when I work to be forgiven.....and then there is Bella. We all know it's been a interesting road, Bella and me. She snores, she farts, she eats my food-just not a lady, you know? I have tried to overlook her poor qualities because she will play with me if I provoke her to, which has proven to be entertaining. When we wrestle, I always win. But that's my life-winning. Bella has also proven to be a great protector from the collie down the street (coincidentally, also named Bella). I don't have the size to scare her (although I assure you I bark and bark at her) but Bella just lets out one growl and we are good to go. I can even tinkle on her grass without retribution.
I am no weather dog but it has not stopped raining in Charlotte in days. I can't deal with the wet ground on my delicate paws so I have had to resort to tinkling in the house again. I know, I know, not ideal, not what a 'grown boy' should do. I have heard enough. You go outside in the rain to find the right spot and relieve yourself, Bob. See how you like it. Now the poo in the study, I knew that would make no one happy-I admit it. A dog's gotta do what a dog's gotta do. And Mommy, you can stop saying "Bennie, you know better". Damn skippy I do-when you go outside to use the potty in the rain, I will too. Peace.
The backyard continues to be a challenge. Recall the enormous fence. Recall I like to dig out. Recall Bob likes to pretend he is the boss. One night Mommy was out and Bob and I were chilling. I went up the stairs to tinkle (realizing my limited options in the rain). Then Bob turned on the oven. If you have forgotten, I am terrified of the oven. No sure why, maybe Mommy's ridiculous baking. Either way, I was done. I snuck past Bob and through the dog door. I went to a low spot in the fence. I DUG. I would have gotten out if Bob had not caught me-and he was not happy. I was put in my kennel until Mommy came home-all muddy. Bob said Mommy had to give me a bath because he was done. Hey BOB -I SAY WHEN WE ARE DONE.
They are leaving again this weekend and we have a new sitter. More to come on how she fares-not making any promises.